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Kate! When she's not busy blowing the heads off of enemies to get to the next level, she's usually playing video games.

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Archive for February 4th, 2008


Why I’ll Never Fly Oceanic Airlines

I spent a lot of quality time with my Xbox 360 over the weekend. On Friday night, the thought of going into Lackluster and having some jackass scream hello at me from across the store was the last thing I wanted, so I opted to rent something through the LIVE marketplace instead. (Side note: Fido is an awesome movie).

While I was browsing through the latest titles, this ad caught my eye:

oceanic2.jpg

Okay… take a minute for the irony to sink in.

Get it yet? You’ll know when you do because your face will automatically look like this:

flatsmiley.jpg

Here’s the idiotic part … some dude (or laday) responsible for Oceanic Airlines’ marketing dollars decided that it would be a FANTASTIC idea to have a sweepstakes to give away an Xbox 360. Ok, not bad. But WHY ARE THEY ADVERTISING THAT ON MY EXISTING XBOX 360?!!?! I don’t need two! Who signed off on that pitch?!

IDIOT: Sir, I believe that Oceanic Airlines has a chance to capture the gaming demographic. Our studies show that gamers have medium to high incomes and travel several times a year.

IDIOT’S BOSS: Oh yeah? Well that’s great. Tell me … what’s the best way to reach the gaming demographic? Through the PS3? Those are so slick. I bought one for my son and one for my daughter yesterday because I have so much money I didn’t know what else to do with it.

IDIOT: Uhm… that’s great sir. But actually, this research shows that none of the true gamers turn on their PS3 unless they’re watching a blu ray disc. It looks like the majority of our target demographic owns an Xbox 360. So – I have this great idea to get our company name in front of this moderate to high income demographic.

[IDIOT'S BOSS starts surfing AdultFriendFinder.com while IDIOT sits on the other side of the desk - oblivious]

IDIOT’S BOSS: Go on…

IDIOT: Well, sir. A recent survey shows that Xbox 360 owners who also own PS3s and Wii consoles spend a whopping 90% of their time on their 360. So, here’s the idea… let’s give these guys an opportunity to win ANOTHER Xbox 360. That way, we’re giving them something we KNOW they like! There’s no chance for backlash! We’ll just offer them a free Oceanic Airline theme for their control panel and draw a few names at random.

[IDIOT'S BOSS ignores IDIOT and keeps clicking through porn]

IDIOT: Sir? What do you think?

IDIOT’S BOSS: Brilliant. Now get out of my office and make it happen. I have important things to do.

FAIL!

UPDATE!!!!!! After doing some research, it turns out that this is all a marketing deal for LOST. If you check out the comments in this article, the first one says:

Anyone else see the weird creepy messages on their website?

Hidden in their HTML code:

If anyone should find this message, please get word I’m alive and stranded on an island somewhere in the South Pacific. Please send help soon. Things are bad. And they’re getting worse…
Sally

AND

I survived a horrific plane crash and am stranded on an island somewhere Northeast of Australia and Southwest of Hawaii. In the event that I am never found, please forward word of my fate to my parents.

They’re hidden by the “we’re shutting down announcement”…odd…I saw some text behind it, so I checked the source and thats what I found…creepy? yes…

SO – that’s pretty cool. I still think the 360 giveaway is stupid, but apparently you can get gamer points and other goodies by downloading the theme too, so it’s not THAT stupid. You can check out the totally fake Oceanic Airlines site here.

Calendar

In the Media

Game Heroes
Video podcast appearance
—June 2008

Sweet Flag
Interview
—May 2008

Attack of the Show
“The Loop” panelist
—November 2007

CrotchMail.com
Interview
—June 2007

TiedTheLeader.com
Interview
—April 2007